Thursday Listening Party

March 26, 2015 by

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On the Thursdays we don’t release a new AMT, we crank up the spoken word audio and have a Thursday Listening Party.
Click here to attend all previous gatherings.

Yesterday evening, I had a sort of real-life Listening Party – a little group of friends and I each chose a podcast episode we all had to listen to, then we gathered together to discuss them, a bit like a book group but for audio (I imagine. I have never actually been to a book group). It was a fun exercise; I recommend it. I listened to some shows I probably wouldn’t have tried otherwise, and was more thoughtful about them than usual. Generally, my main thought about podcasts is ‘Please be loud enough to drown out this argument on the bus’.

Anyway, if you’re interested, the shows which came out on top at Podcast Club were Song Exploder and Death, Sex and Money. Let us not speak of the bad.

Go to the comments to suggest podcasts I/Podcast Club should try, please! I’m always on the lookout for new things to listen to.

If you’re looking for a selection of different shows that you wouldn’t necessarily come across otherwise, try Radiotonic. The feed has documentaries, dramas, stories, all well made and worth your time.

Probably not worth your time is courtroom TV, but I really enjoyed this episode of Strangers in which the reluctant booker for those shows shares the ups and downs of the job. Also, it was a bit of a relief to hear a Strangers episode that didn’t make me a tad weepy on public transport…

Last week AMTpal Dave Pickering celebrated reaching 200 episodes of his podcast Getting Better Acquainted by letting other people get better acquainted with him, for a change – including me! Hear me interview Dave here.

Remember to listen to Olly host The Media Podcast. And there’s a new episode of my other podcast The Allusionist, all about how dictionaries look like they’re telling you the truth but are in fact LYING LIARS. I am very disillusioned. (DisAllusioned?) Click here for more about the episode and ways to hear it, or just play:

Have you listened to AMT310 yet? We speculate about putting on a production of Jurassic Park: The Ballet, reminisce about the Brownies, and spare no mercy for crappy chicken-flavoured crisps. Don’t even try to defend them when there’s cheese’n’onion flavour in this world.

See you next Thursday for AMT311!

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EPISODE 310: collops

March 19, 2015 by

Queen brownies

Phwoar! Look at the orbs on that! Etc.

Why are we leering over an inaccurate drawing of Her Maj? Find out in Answer Me This! Episode 310:

Subscribe to AMT! on iTunes listen to the MP3 through your computer soundcloud-icon our podcast feed on Libsyn Share with Facebook

Today we consider:

Brownies
bacon
Hamlet cigars
cleaning your stovetop
cleaning like Robocop
the redundancy of toothpaste
the ethics of Tesco Clubcard vouchers
Jurassic Park: The Ballet
Home Alone: The Ballet
Miss Saigon: The Helicopter
post-coital smoking
post-coital tristesse
and
chicken-flavoured crisps.

Plus: Olly is ready to join a Cub Pack for adults; Helen campaigns for Cheetos to be sold in the UK; and the latest victim of Martin the Sound Man’s uncanny impersonations is Jeff Goldblum. What did Goldblum ever do to you, Martin? We also hear back from AMT308 questioneer Lizzie, whose life is getting more Sliding Doors with every passing episode.

For further beanery following AMT309, peruse the listener-submitted Bean Gallery, and listen to today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iThings, Android and Windows gadgets) in which listener Nick describes his recent experience of sitting in a baked bean bath for 27 HOURS. For charity. Not for his own fun.

For our fun and yours, please supply us with your questions. Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and fire emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And be our online pal at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

Thanks very much to Squarespace.com for supporting this episode, and for giving you 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year if you use the code ‘ANSWER‘. Go forth and create the website of your dreams! (The good dreams, not the ones where you’re being chased by a terrifying headless monk with the claws of a bear.)

we’ll return on 2nd April 2015 with AMT311. Join us!

Helen & Olly

••• AMT310 Child-Friendly Rating: 77%. Only a couple of swears. Content is pretty clean, even a question about post-coital smoking. •••

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humanising the human statues

March 17, 2015 by

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309

Angela from Seattle writes:

I’m just catching up on a few episodes I missed.

Re AMT287, I see our well known painted statue gentleman walk through the neighborhood to catch the bus quite often. He is also regularly downtown at the bus stop and outside his post at Pike Place. Regularly in the rain with no running of his body paint. It astounds me.

When I see him walking past my house I always want to say hello and invite him in for a drink but alas, what is the protocol there? Answer me this: how does one go about convincing a living statue to come in and chat? (Is that creepy?! I am so curious about how and what he does outside of work.)

Readers, do you think there’s a romantic element to Angela’s interest in the human statue? Does she want to Pygmalion this situation?

Whether you do or not, head to the comments to suggest non-creepy ways for Angela to extend the hand of friendship – and also to discover the secrets of his stay-put make-up.

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Fifty Shades of Prank

March 17, 2015 by

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309

We love a good prank and we love a happy ending, so we double-love this correspondence from Richard in Finsbury Park:

In AMT303 you talked about my inappropriate prank on my elderly mum. I had put Fifty Shades of Grey on her Kindle with the names of the main characters changed to my mum and dad’s: Christine and Frank.

Well finally she has read the thing. I was worried she might go ape when she rumbled me. She didn’t. Look at the email she sent me. I think I have the best natured parent on the planet.

Well you little bugger, I have been making such a fool of myself as I thought that the characters in 50 Shades were really called Frank and Christine. It would never have occurred to me that the names throughout a whole book could be changed. This morning in the hairdressers I asked a lady who had read the trilogy why the names had changed in the second book. She said they hadn’t and when I said they were Frank and Christine, Lee said ‘I think someone has been having you on’. Then the penny dropped and everyone in the shop was in stitches. I don’t know how you did it and I had been telling people what a coincidence it was, how silly am I. Dad said, ‘Well, that is a typical Richardism,’ so now you can have a good laugh. Wait ’til you get here and you might find your flies sewn up or one leg off your trousers!

Mum

So answer me this: what can I do to wind her up next?

It’s surely her turn to prank you in return, isn’t it? But if you really want to risk a second round, perhaps some of the AMT squad have some cunning ideas. Readers, go to the comments and suggest a jape. I still think you’ll be hard pushed to beat Richard’s original prank, but I feel you’re up to the challenge.

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wedding present pay-off

March 16, 2015 by

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309

We are pleased to hear back from Matri-Money Troubles from Kent and also AMT306:

Thanks very much for your advice. Your chat raised some good points and ultimately you were right: the groom is a good friend, it’s one day (hopefully) and I shouldn’t be such an arse about it. In the end I stuffed an envelope with a wad of cash, put it in his hand and wished them a happy honeymoon.

And boy was I glad I took your advice when, during the speeches, he thanked me for all I had done, all my help, and for being such a good friend, before giving me a rather expensive thank you gift in front of everyone.

Had I not followed your advice I would’ve:

a) felt like a dick; and
b) looked like a dick.

Thanks for saving my arse.

You’re welcome, MMT. Don’t think of it as a wedding gift; think of it as an investment in the future of your friendship. Cheap at twice the price!

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Thursday Listening Party

March 12, 2015 by

image

On the Thursdays we don’t release a new AMT, we crank up the spoken word audio and have a Thursday Listening Party.
Click here to attend all previous gatherings.

Whether or not you’re a fan of Mark Kermode and Simon Mayo’s Film Reviews – and who in the podcast-listening realm isn’t? – apply yourself to Mark Kermode‘s recent Radio 4 series The Business of Film, also available as a podcast. It’s as entertaining and informative as you’d expect Kermode to be about the business of film, plus there’s some pH1 bitchery from film industry insiders (ahem, Matthew Vaughn).

Private Eye has a new podcast! Which is a surprise, given how their staff usually prefer to remain anonymous. Here it is, for you news, politics and satire fans.

As regular Thursday Listening Party attendees will have clocked, I have an apparently inexhaustible appetite for podcasts in which people divulge true stories from their lives. I’ve recently been listening to The Longest Shortest Time, which may be sold as a parenting podcast but is really about LIFE, and is very welcome to me even given my child-averse status.

Finally, I’m recommending The Sporkful to you again, because it’s so much fun, and particularly when Dan Pashman goes all agony uncle for food.

Oh, us?

Remember to listen to Olly host The Media Podcast and 1-4am weeknightmornings on LBC.

And please try my newish show The Allusionist. The new episode will confirm what you’ve always suspected when you’ve been going round a museum: the real exhibit is YOU. THEY ARE WATCHING.

See you next Thursday for AMT310!

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Beans Gallery

March 11, 2015 by

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309

In things-we-didn’t-know-we-wanted-but-are-sort-of-pleased-you’ve-decided-to-give-us news:

Following the baked bean bath chat in AMT309, some of you have, of your own volition, decided to get busy with the photoshop. Click on the images for the full-sized pictures, and bean artist credits.

If you are moved to do the same, email your bean masterpieces and we’ll add them to the gallery, for posterity.

PS Remember the AMT Photoshop Challenge? That was fun!

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EPISODE 309: Have It Your Way

March 5, 2015 by

We’re a crossword clue and a powerful influence upon Burger King’s business plans; what might Answer Me This! Episode 309 wreak?

Subscribe to AMT! on iTunes listen to the MP3 through your computer soundcloud-icon our podcast feed on Libsyn Share with Facebook

On today’s agenda:

existential cats vs existential dogs
Garfield vs Falstaff
Gotham vs Gotham
cookies vs soup
Woodstock
Shazam at funerals
Audrey Hepburn’s pet fawn
Tippi Hedren’s pet lion
Mike Tyson’s pet tiger
Mike Tyson’s pet pigeons
Nicolas Cage’s pet octopus
baked bean baths
Cuckoo Bush Mound
stage weapons
sexy spaghetti
and
Olly’s ABSOLUTELY UNCANNY impression of Ben Affleck as Batman.

Plus: here’s our previous work on the origins of Gotham City; here’s some advice for you if you’re planning a sexy spagetti bath; let us know what your most uncomfortable and gross charity endeavour was; and would you whip out your phone to Shazam this song during a funeral?

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (get it for iDevices, Android and Windows gadgets) there’s a little more about the history of Gotham. We think we’ve triangulated where Catwoman is pursuing her postgrad education.

Send us questions, please! Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. You can also keep us company online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll be back on 19th March 2015 with AMT310, hopefully you will be too.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT309 Child-Friendly Rating: 70%. The language is coarse, but the content isn’t particularly. •••

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Luna still falling into bathtub

March 5, 2015 by

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT308

In case you were wondering about feline viral star Luna who appeared in AMT308, her manager/human owner Jess has been back in touch:

Just for clarity, I’d like to point out that despite being somewhat intially perturbed by her bath experience as a 8 week old kitten, Luna is now 6 yrs old and continues to investigate the bath EVERY SINGLE TIME I have one. She has fallen in several times whilst sitting on the edge (once with painful results for me…), so if anything she seems to enjoy falling in, or she has the memory of a goldfish.

OR she’s trying to get another viral hit out of it. But lightning doesn’t strike twice, Luna. You’re going to have to get your head stuck in the toilet seat or wear a funny outfit, otherwise everyone will think you’re just a one-trick pony cat.

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beatboxing hands

March 4, 2015 by

google-expressive-beats-lee-and-beardyman-beatboxing-is-amazing

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT308

Tom has cast light upon the question about human beatboxers’ hands from AMT307:

I do a bit of beatboxing and I find that the hand movements are pretty involuntary – I’d have to concentrate not to do them.

I think it’s just a natural impulse that helps keep time. I find that I do the same whenever I’m playing music and have a free hand, for example when playing a one-handed piano part, the free hand starts waving up and down or tapping on something of its own accord.

I know a couple of other beatboxers who say the same thing. No doubt there is some amount of people doing it on purpose for the reasons you mentioned, but I don’t even realise I’m doing it – every time I see a video of myself beatboxing it looks like I’m having some sort of episode.

Seems sensible enough, Tom. Now, can you account for Martin the Sound Man’s air drumming nearly everywhere he goes?

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“Congratulations! To ME!”

March 3, 2015 by

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This questioneer asked to remain anonymous, but you’ll know who she is when she turns up wearing a 12-week scan as a fascinator:

We just found out we are having a baby, we want to tell people but you have to wait three months and in calculating when that is, it turns out it’s on our friend’s wedding day…

Answer me this… should we wait until after the wedding or do we do it then, will that be totally stealing thunder?

If I found that out on my wedding day (i.e. if it were the other way around) I would be really happy for them and I think it would add to the day. But obviously that’s me.

Even if it is not just you, Expectant Attention-Embezzler, the odds aren’t great that the newlyweds are eager for you to ‘add to the day’. But you know you don’t have to make your announcement bang on the three-month mark, right? It’s not like if you don’t tell people then, you can’t mention the child again until its 25th birthday.

Readers, what do you think? Tell people the day before? Tell people the day after? Or on the wedding day, stand around with one hand on your stomach and the other batting away glasses of champagne and let Dame Rumour do the rest of the work for you?

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Spotted: Ainsley Harriott

March 3, 2015 by

ainsley

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT308

Since AMT306, it seems like we’re really doing this. We’re really sharing our Ainsley Harriott spots.

Today’s correspondent who has been Ainsley-blessed is Alistair:

I once met Ainsley Harriott in a Sainsburys checking out in front of me and a friend.

He saw us buying just vodka and coke and said, ‘Alright boys, looking to get some pussy tonight?’ It was uncomfortable.

Sounds it. Anyone else got an uncomfortable Close Encounter of the Harriott Kind to report? Let it out, let it all out. Now’s the time.

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