smells like old lady spirit

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bathing-in-perfume-gas-mask

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Here’s a question of pongs from Tom from Yerevan, Armenia:

I have recently given up smoking and as a result my sense of smell and taste have begun to return, which is bloody wonderful.

I am also dating a lovely Iranian woman who I like very much. However, there is one tiny problem. She wears perfume every day. In fact she wears a lot of perfume every day. Back when I was smoking I didn’t really notice and in fact I quite liked how she smelled, but now I have started to notice with my heightened senses that the scent can be a little overpowering at times.

Furthermore, the perfume she wears is a very popular brand where we live in Yerevan (Armenia) and many older women also wear it.

I don’t want her to stop wearing perfume altogether, but I think I would be happier if she wore less, or maybe switched to something that is a little different to what she wears now.

So please answer me this: How can I tell my wonderful Iranian girlfriend that she smells like an old Armenian woman without causing upset or some sort of difficult diplomatic situation??

First tip: avoid using the phrase ‘smells like an old Armenian woman’.

If my creaking old memory serves, we’ve addressed this problem before – I think one of you had an overly scented grandmother? – and solutions included 1) buying her a watered-down version of the same fragrance, eg the eau de toilette versus the full-power perfume; 2) pretending to be allergic to it by sneezing/painting on a rash. Readers, what would you do? [RWWYD?]

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One Response to “smells like old lady spirit”

  1. Amelia Says:

    Ah! This is one of those situations where honesty is the most awkward, but probably also the best option. Nothing wrong with saying, “Darling, I really love you and the way you smell, but since I’ve quit smoking I’ve become quite sensitive to perfumes and other fragrances, and I know you don’t wear that much (white lie!), but I was wondering if you might be able to wear less, or perhaps none, for a while whilst my senses right themselves again?”

    Not a funny solution, but, perhaps, an effective one. Good luck!

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