Posts Tagged ‘Megan Fox’

EPISODE 298 – White Bread World

September 18, 2014

Happy Scottish Referendum Day, everyone! To commemorate, in Answer Me This! Episode 298 we decipher what Scotland’s finest non-whisky exports the Proclaimers were going on about. Vote YES to listening:

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We also contemplate:

actors’ posthumous endorsements
Jacob Frank
godparenting
James Brown’s bridge vs Robbie Williams’s bridge
Henry Hoover
tubby Ryan Gosling vs Peter Jackson
tubby Jared Leto vs gout
tubby Christian Bale vs emaciated Christian Bale vs tubby Christian Bale vs emaciated Christian Bale
being shot in the shoulder vs being shot in the ball
and
‘Uptown Girl’.

Plus: Olly’s pet Roomba hates not hiding under the sofa; Helen hates disco; and Martin the Sound Man hates the ethics of the contracts for Baywatch, which is bad news for anybody hoping of a revival of that show starring Martin. Him running in slowmo down a beach, haversack full of microphones swaying seductively, will have to remain only in your imagination.

Ahem.

In today’s Bit of Crap on the App, which is available for iDevices old and new, Android or Windows playthings, we continue Cathy’s question about godparenting, and whether you’re obliged to buy a silver spoon for a baby. Because what says ‘Welcome to the world!’ as much as a spoon that tastes weird? Maybe we should start putting around the rumour that the traditional christening gift for godchildren is one of our albums or vintage episodes from answermethisstore.com. They’ll probably grow into it.

We cannot grow without your QUESTIONS, so call the Question Line on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And be our online friend at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

Thanks very much to Squarespace.com, for sponsoring this episode, for allowing people to build and host websites easily and beautifully, and for offering you 10% off their services for a whole year if you use the code Answer.

And joy of all joys, Martin the Sound Man has a delightful new album out, available now HERE. Make an old Sound Man happy by downloading those sounds.

We will return with AMT299 (TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY FRICKING NINE!!!!) on 2nd October, and we hope you do too.

Yours haveringly,

Helen & Olly

••• AMT298 Child-Friendly Rating: 52%. A few medium-ranking swears and an F-level swear. Discussion of dick-shaped vacuum cleaners and Barry Manilow’s penis, which latter may prove traumatic for all ages. •••


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EPISODE 179 – it’s not all Space Dust and Nik Naks, you know

June 16, 2011

Over the years, one question has kept us awake at night (other than, “Did I remember to turn the oven off?” and “How can the next-door neighbours like listening to Duffy this much?”): where do all the spurned Build-A-Bear bears go? Do they end up in a bear workhouse, or are they turned out onto the streets to survive by turning tricks and picking pockets?

Thankfully, no. After Answer Me This! Episode 179 we will, at last, be able to sleep the deep sleep borne out of the relief that the poor orphant bears do find a good home:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

In today’s episode we also consider:

Co-op Funerals
doll hospitals
the mystery of Glenn Miller
McCain’s Pizza Rollers
office toys
cycle helmets
the most striking aspect of Jordan’n’Dane Bowers’ sex tape
reality TV vs. reality
Dame Bruce Forsyth
Chris Cooley’s cock (NSFW!)
Ruth Badger
the Black Eyed Peas’ next hit (shudder)
20p
Gwyneth Paltrow in Glee
symbolism in ET
and
toff prison.

Plus: Olly sees right through posh Findus Crispy Pancakes to the publicity stunt beneath; Helen surmises why seminal movie scenes such as this are not set in Business Studies lessons; and Martin the Sound Man pipes up in favour of hot goo. Yes, he does.

Please join us next week for episode 180, in which we will do a full 180 on everything we’ve ever said so far, apart from one thing which will remain forever true: we want you to send us your QUESTIONS, by leaving voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or find answermethis on Skype) or sending emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Gimme gimme gimme.

Helen & Olly

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EPISODE 149 – Bazooka Joe

September 9, 2010


At last, the special guestisode featuring Ian Collins off TalkSPORT has arrived! In it we find out a great deal about the great man: his life in pencils, his close relationship with the Home Office, his special form of vigilante justice, and his position as the only man in the world who thinks Cheryl Cole is ‘a bit of a munter’.


This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

In it, Ian talks to us about such matters as:

Cleethorpes

Morrissey
Rugrats
Ikea pencils vs. Ikea meatballs
pub quiz machines vs. rightness
bubble vs. chewing in the battle of the gums
parliament vs. coconuts
Larry David
courtroom quizzes
the gravy and mini apple pies diet
Boots the Chemist
Spitting Image‘s legal defence
Henry Frankenstein?
and
Wall’s sausage ice-cream

Plus: Olly has beef with the Wood Green branch of Harvester; Helen has beef with infantilised adults; and Ian has beef with PC Stamp from The Bill. Martin the Sound Man does not have beef with anyone this episode, but he will have beef with you if you don’t buy his album; so you’d better do that unless you want to feel his wrath.

This week’s slice of bonus fun on the app is a question from Daniel from Wakefield’s question about Darth Vader’s heavy breathing. He has more in common with Beverley Craven and Helen’s family dog than previously thought.

Now don’t be cross, but next week is the last episode of the series, so get your QUESTIONS in, quick! Leave a voice message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, or send an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of stuff to listen to during our VERY BRIEF break, because of all the free or cheap-as-chips audiobooks which Audible.co.uk wish to bestow upon you – click here to get yours!

See you next week, loves,

Helen and Olly

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Web 2009 with Helen and Olly

January 1, 2010

** Click here for The Best of Answer Me This! 2009 – Part II **

Happy New Year, chums!

We saw out 2009 in pleasing and civilised fashion, and we hope you did too. But, thanks to pre-recording, on New Year’s Eve we also presented a radio show, Web 2009 with Helen and Olly. It was our first ever proper radio programme, and we would be ever so happy if you would listen to it; it’ll be available until Thursday 7th January, so CLICK HERE to do so via BBC iplayer, or download it as a podcast from the BBC website.

And if you wouldn’t mind telling your radio-and-internet-loving friends about it, tweeting it, or posting it up on Facebook, then we owe you a lollipop the next time we see you. Which, if you go to the same gym as Olly, is probably quite soon.

Links to all the nominees and winners are below – and another good link is THIS ONE to Martin the Sound Man’s free EP of songs about space. Give it a whirl!

Helen and Olly’s 2009 Web Awards went to:

David Schneider after winning our 'Tweeter of the Year' award

PUBLIC SERVICE OF THE YEAR
Our award for the sites that have become entirely essential this year. We never leave the house without them.
* Spotify *
– Google Streetview
– The Arts Desk
– Nicecritic
– DeathSwitch

WEB FEUD OF THE YEAR
Our celebration of the best online scraps of the year – the unfolding dramas of real, raw arguments that, thanks to the global public forum that is the internet, we can all enjoy.
* Megan Fox vs. the Transformers crew *
– Guido Fawkes vs. Derek Draper
– Stephen Fry vs. @BrumPlum
– Michael Chopra vs. Heather Swan
– Perez Hilton vs. Carrie Prejean

TWEETER OF THE YEAR
Our favourite short-form communicators of the past twelve months.
* David Schneider *
– John Prescott
– Phillip Schofield
– Richard Bacon
– Mrs Stephen Fry

TIME-WASTER OF THE YEAR
Useful as the internet can be, let’s not forget its primary function: frittering your time away. What has been the major enemy of productivity in 2009?
* My Very Worst Date *
– ’25 Random Things About Me’
– Cake Wrecks
– Letters of Note
– AnaFace

EPIC FAIL OF THE YEAR
Our award for those embarrassing moments that went viral in 2009.
* Gordon Brown on YouTube *
– The Baby Shaker iPhone App
– Kimberley Swann is fired
– John X from Cornell Business School
– Christian Bale’s on-set rant

ONLINE JAPE OF THE YEAR
In the olden days, pranks involved propping a bucket of water on the top of a door, or thrusting stinging nettles down someone’s pants. But the internet has opened up a whole new world of mischief…
* Ross Noble’s Twitterbomb Tuesday *
– upside-down YouTube
– Computertan.com
– renegade reviewers on Amazon
– Classic songs reinterpreted by Microsoft Songsmith

INTERNET SONG OF THE YEAR
Who was our Joe McElderry, and who will be our Rage Against The Machine?
* ‘United Breaks Guitars’ by Dave Carroll *
– ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ by the Muppets
– ‘Goodbye Twitter’ by Miley Cyrus
– ‘Hot and Cold’ by Los Colorados
– ‘Poker Face’ by Walt Ribeiro

WEBLEBRITY OF THE YEAR
The award for the internet star to have shot furthest in the online firmament this year
* Jill and Kevin *
– Susan Boyle
– Tavi Gevinson
– Little Boots
– ‘Poo Girl’

And finally, the LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD went to 104-year-old Ivy Bean, the oldest person on Twitter and, quite possibly, the whole of the internet…

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