Posts Tagged ‘olives’

The Best of AMT 2015

December 24, 2015

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Join us for a jaunt through The Best of Answer Me This! 2015, where we revisit such bright spots from the year as:

Paul Simon Says
Buddha, fat and thin
the Stephen King’s IT tattoo
the CKBLT (Chicken Kiev BLT sandwich)
Jurassic Park: The Ballet
Juliet’s balcony
Grumpy Cat
Melanie Griffith’s lion
Nicolas Cage’s octopus
Andre Rieu’s face
highlighter pen(i)s
undead Mike Oldfield
wedding +1 etiquette
Byrd Sister
Greek wine
dominatrix problems
and
olive theft.

And, as every year, there are the Previously Unheard Bits of AMT, plus our favourite: the Melancholy Voicemail Parade.

Haven’t heard the Best Of AMT collections from previous years? Get them at answermethisstore.com/best. All the hits, none of the shits!

Also while you’re at the AMT store, you can buy our classic episodes, albums and apps. By doing so, you’re supporting the show – and obliterating the howling silence, right?

Send in your questions for AMT in 2016: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Befriend us online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll return with AMT330 on 14th January 2016. Happy Christmas/New Year/early January to you all, and thanks for listening this year.

Helen & Olly

••• Best of 2015 Child-Friendly Rating: 50%. As in, 50% of the content is child-friendly. The other 50% really isn’t. You know the score by now. •••

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EPISODE 305: chicken and egg

January 8, 2015

Welcome to the ninth year of AMT! Before we get stuck into Answer Me This! Episode 305, care to guess which literary work is the inspiration for this questioneer’s tattoo?

unnamed-2

Check your answers in the show, which is here:

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Today we consider:

stealing back gifts
cheese-slicers
small socks
chocolate mice (sadly not the kind you’d include in your pick’n’mix)
Winnie-the-Pooh vs It
Tim Curry
olive crimes
audiobook auditions
doro wat
tan leather goods
and
Carmen Electra.

Plus: Olly likes to hang loose, even in his gloves; Helen’s going to have to work on her offensive foreign accents if she wants a career narrating audiobooks; and Martin the Sound Man’s morals go to shit around olives.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App Olly discovers the one type of present his dad Stanley IS happy to receive. Give yourself this gift by getting the app for your iDevices, Android and Windows gadgets.

Give us the gift of your questions, as voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And be our online friend at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

Thanks very much to Squarespace.com for supporting this episode, and for giving you 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year if you use the code ‘answer’. You want a nice website, don’t you? DON’T YOU? Thought so.

We’ll be back with AMT306 on 22nd January, so be ready.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT305 Child-Friendly Rating: 80%. Maybe we’ve forgotten something, but we think both language and content were pretty above-board today. Moments of parental concern may have occurred during the discussions of Stephen King’s It, and Carmen Electra. •••

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EPISODE 250 – provincial or Provençal?

March 28, 2013

Greetings, podlings!

Spring has yet to spring in our homeland, but the spring run of AMT is ready to spring into your ears right now. Spring into action and listen to Answer Me This! Episode 250:

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Today we discuss:

pizza delivery
Billy Kennedy’s fluffy dice
lolliPopes
selling intangibles on eBay
papal pants
Les Miserables, unabridged
musicals vs. literature
second-hand gravestones vs. serial killer memorabilia
the Littlewoods catalogue
and
the Vatican’s sauna.

Plus: Olly would rather be gifted olives than a car; Helen is not comfortable being on first-name terms with South By Southwest; and Martin the Sound Man is uncharacteristically quiet, which you can attribute to the presence of a bag of Cheetos.

In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) we speculate upon what name Kate’n’Wills are likely to bestow upon their impending royal spawn. Clue: it’ll be something more boring than any of these.

Not boring, on the other hand, are your QUESTIONS. We want lots of them for the new series, so don’t be shy: leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis; or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

Apropos of more things to listen to this week: click here to hear Helen on Jordan, Jesse, Go! And our free Audible audiobook offer is still open, but not for long! You have until midnight on 1st April to get yourself a free audiobook, so click here right now.

What are you still doing here? Click!

Helen & Olly

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“You’re just a virgin (oil) who can’t drive.”

June 27, 2012

CLICK HERE FOR AMT220

Here’s another question about liquids from Rob, who claims to be stuck at work. From his question, I’m guessing he works at an olive oil factory, and he isn’t too good at his job. He asks:

What’s the difference between olive oil, virgin olive oil and extra virgin olive oil?

Several pounds in price. And a vow of chastity.

Alright FINE. There’s more, but it’s a bit boring and technical, ok? I was merely trying to save you with glibness.

I’ve checked my weekly newsletters from the International Olive Oil Council, which says that olive oil is ‘Oil obtained solely from the fruit of the olive tree (Olea europaea L.) to the exclusion of oils obtained using solvents or re-esterification processes and of any mixture with oils of other kinds.’

So, oil made out of olives. Simple enough so far.

Here’s what they have to say about virgin olive oil: ‘Olive oil fit for consumption as it is. Olive oil obtained from the fruit of the olive tree (Olea europea L.) solely by mechanical or other physical means under conditions, particularly thermal conditions, that do not lead to alterations in the oil, and which has not undergone any treatment other than washing, decantation, centrifugation and filtration.
Virgin olive oil which has a free acidity, expressed as oleic acid, of not more than 2 grams per 100 grams and the other characteristics of which correspond to those fixed for this category in the IOC standard (COI/T.15/NC No 3).’

Everyone still following? Oil. Made of olives. Not heated up too much. No more than 2% acidic. Numbers and letters. So what of the extra virgin olive oil, that which Jamie Oliver pours over his cornflakes? That is:

‘Virgin olive oil fit for consumption as it is which has a free acidity, expressed as oleic acid, of not more than 0.8 grams per 100 grams, and the other characteristics of which correspond to those fixed for this category in the IOC standard (COI/T.15/NC No 3).’

So there I was, thinking the adjectives referred to how many pressings the olives had been through or something, but actually it’s all a matter of acid. Back to work, everybody.

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The Best of AMT2011 part 1

December 16, 2011

What an eventful year 2011 has been. Earthquakes, tsunamis, nuclear terror! Sit-ins, protests, riots! So many revolutions, we can’t even choose a favourite! Charlie Sheen being a messed-up addict – but funny, so it’s fine! Osama Bin Laden’s dramatic exit! Pippa Middleton’s bottom!

Plenty has happened here at Answer Me This! too, so take a jaunt with us into the vale of the recent past: here is The Best of AMT2011, part 1.

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just £1.99 at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

What a lot we learnt this year! About such things as:

space tourism
coloured bathroom suites
William’n’Dorothy Wordsworth
celebrity cock-shots
ornamental jellyfish
The Apprentice
Dodgy
‘Like a G6’
Dane Bowers’n’Jordan’s sex tape
John Travolta’s face vs. Nicolas Cage’s face
glass slippers
impulse bags
fake tan
undone flies
Saturday Toilet
Olly’s lost night of Chico
doll hospital
phallic salad
phallic statues
phallic celebrity waxworks
phallic phalluses
and
Adult Milkybar.

There’s plenty more to come next week; but if you want plenty more AMT next year, then send us your QUESTIONS: deliver emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com and leave voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877, Skype answermethis).

We have to say a huge thanks to everybody who has sent us something to celebrate our impending 5th birthday – we’ve already received many glorious cards, some rather exciting little presents, and enough sugary treats to push us over to the wrong side the Type 2 Diabetes fence! If you want to propel us into hyperglycaemic hyperdrive, or you want to show off your best penmanship, please dispatch a missive to:

Answer Me This!
PO Box 53587
London
SE19 9BQ

Thankyou for delighting us by post, listeners. You really are a tiptop bunch.

See you next Thursday, for the Best of AMT2011 part 2!

Helen & Olly

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EPISODE 189 – when you can only achieve orgasm using spreads

August 25, 2011

It’s pretty unusual for us podcasters to venture out of our comfortable armchairs, let alone venture into the great not-indoors. Last weekend, however, we donned our cagoules, stocked up on wet-wipes, and took in a lungful of folk-laced fresh air at the Green Man festival – where we had such a smashing time, we decided to record Answer Me This! Episode 189 right there:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

In a field in Wales, we talk about:

camping with Charlotte Church
Batman: Arkham City
zebra-riding
cornichons
talking trains
the sexy Green M&M
the 9 1/2 Weeks fridge
the Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny vs. Jessica Rabbit
Cadbury World vs. Kraft World
George W. Ferris
Mrs Fat Controller
and
local anaesthetic.

Plus: Olly fears the revenge of Kris Marshall; Helen discovers a sport she IS interested in: topless frisbee; and Martin the Sound Man sees a future where Batman and Catwoman give birth to Dustin Hoffman.

As you’ll hear, we were joined this week by some unexpected guests in the shape of wasps. (They weren’t just shaped like wasps; they were wasps.) Next week, we should be joined by a much less stingy and stripy special guest in the shape of Jon Ronson. (He’s not just shaped like Jon Ronson, he is Jon Ronson.) So concoct some QUESTIONS for the fan of psychopaths, goat-starers and Robbie Williams, and send them in the form of voicemails to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or Skype answermethis) or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

We do hope that Jon remembers to turn up, but whether he does or not, we’ll deffers see you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

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EPISODE 166 – a dwarf standing on the shoulders of 100 stacked dwarves

February 10, 2011

Dear podcast-listeners,

There have been three times in his life where Olly Mann couldn’t speak French, so he let the funky music do the talking: 1) his GCSE French oral exam, which is why he received a D grade; 2) one mad, hot night at the Bruni-Sarkozy holiday bungalow; and 3) in Answer Me This! Episode 166:


This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

En Anglais, we talk of:

Blu-Tack sunblock
J.Lo’s nipple tweaker
the tragic end of Bobby in Home and Away
Bernard of Chartres
John Scurlock
Pyramus and Thisbe
Oasis
the Tower of London
James Bond: babyfather
the oldest underwater foot-tunnel (with some qualification)
disgruntled Beefeaters
Pretty Woman, Kate Middleton-style
bouncy bungalows
bouncy Roulette
Mike Flowers Pops
the Sea Life Centre vs. the Chunnel
sexy salad servers
Coventry
and
Teri Hatcher.

Plus: mainstream Olly prefers vaginas when a baby isn’t being shunted out of them; Helen discovers her new favourite TV channel; and Martin the Sound Man claims that when his dad said he was just “off to the glory hole”, there was a perfectly innocent explanation. Keep drinking the kool-aid, Martin!

This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iPhone or Android, yessir) is a question from Gareth about what’s the oldest thing still in use today. My dad’s underpants. HA. (Seriously: 40+ years’ service and still going strong.)

Please keep bombarding us with your QUESTIONS, by leaving us a voicemail on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or findanswermethis on Skype) or sending us an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

See you next Thursday!

Helen & Olly

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EPISODE 144 – closer to a potato choc-ice

August 5, 2010

Dear friends,

If, like Olly, you are delightfully innocent and pure-minded, listen with care to Answer Me This! Episode 144; for, like him, you will probably be SHOCKED TO THE VERY CORE to understand what the heck that mucky broad Britney Spears was on about in her ‘If You Seek Amy’ ditty. We don’t know which was more shocking: the blatant sauce of the double meaning, or the topsy-turvy grammar of the single meaning.


This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Delicious Miss Dahl’s dirty martinis
skate’s dirty parts
Sea Pebbles
citric acid
‘Scotland the Brave’ vs. ‘Greensleeves’
the MTV Cribs diet
carbonated champagne
matzo meal
Clamato
kosher fish
those child-hating bastards Cybercandy
strawberries
the spoon trick
Hatch End
fizzy cola bottle inequity
and
modern marginalia.

Plus: Olly compares his pioneeringderanged snacking habits to Heston Blumenthal; Helen ruins Olly’s favourite delicacy, tipple, and high school sing-song tv series; and Martin the Sound Man does a rap, gives insight into the dairy consumption of tramps, and otherwise disgraces himself.

We also peer beneath the frilly underskirts of Great British Questions Episode 3: Romance, exposing some mild disappointment in the world’s biggest coloured pencil, and wondering whether the Cerne Abbas giant has been slacking on his fatherly duties thus far. Meanwhile, over on the fair shores of the AMT app, we speak of marginal things we like. Nothing pervy, unless you are aroused by the shoes of elderly Jews.

Now it’s time to give us your QUESTIONS; please bestow them upon is in the form of a voice message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis or an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. How thrilled we shall be to receive them!

See you next Thursday for Episode 145, and on the preceding Tuesday for Episode Four of Great British Questions, in which we glug down sufficient tea to rehydrate the Kalahari.

Helen and Olly

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