Posts Tagged ‘smells’

EPISODE 351: scary worm

June 1, 2017

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Hello, listeners! Answer us this: how would you define ‘Afternoon Delight’?

1. Settling down to watch Countdown with a nice cup of tea (not Lipton) and a nice biscuit (not one that gives you a 20-year-long health fear)?
2. Bit of post-lunch pre-dinner nookie?
3. Listening to Answer Me This! Episode 351, admittedly a delight at any hour of the day?

Today we speak of:

smelly books
the Twitter blue verified tick
Olly Mann vs his more successful and accomplished friend Tom Price
the Intervision Song Contest
artificial Oval Offices
articifical Houses of Commons
medieval dragons
stoned dads
Lipton tea
Afternoon Delight‘ in Anchorman, Glee, Good Will Hunting
and
The Beatles in The Jungle Book?

Plus: Olly has a great tip for maximising your chances of competing in Eurovision; Helen recounts her life’s proudest achievement, no thanks to Lipton; and Martin the Sound Man is a WINNER. Whether you enjoy the works of Tom Waits or not, listen to Martin’s award-winning podcast Song By Song at songbysongpodcast.com.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – Helen gets thrown out of a nightspot for not having the right ID. That’s 37-year-old teetotaller Helen.

Want to hear more from us? There’s the retro AMT episode we throw into your feed mid-month; to get it, subscribe to AMT on your podcatcher of choice. All of our back catalogue is available from answermethisstore.com, along with our special albums including the AMT Sports Day.

Listen to our other work, too, eg Olly’s The Week Unwrapped and The Modern Mann, Helen’s Allusionist, and Martin’s AWARD-WINNING Song By Song.

Thanks to our sponsor Squarespace.com. After putting off building herself a website, AT LAST listener Anna swept aside her inner resistance/fear/laziness, went ahead and created karakalou.com to showcase her artwork (here’s her portrait of The Zaltzwoman). She got 10% off Squarespace’s website-hosting and -designing services for a whole year with the discount code ‘answer‘. Be smart like Anna! Do it! Now! Or in a few minutes! But do it then! What are you waiting for – a free lollipop? Maybe Squarespace will give you one if you stop procrastinating.

Send us your QUESTIONS: call the Question Line on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, and email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Be our interfriend at twitter.com/HelenAndOlly and facebook.com/answermethis.

We’ll be back with AMT352 on 6 July 2017, and with a Retro AMT on 22 June.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT351 Child-Friendly Rating: 48%. Some swears, sex and drug references; endorsement of non-essential teabag theft, which may send your offspring down the wrong path. •••

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EPISODE 350: mysterious fluid

May 4, 2017

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Ever run over a fox and thought, “Mmm, maybe I could cook that up for dinner – but how?” No? Well, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 350 anyway. You never know when survivalist recipes might come in handy.

polar bear liver
pixelating Naked and Afraid
mothers vs mountains
Olly getting slebspotted
George’s Marvellous Medicine
Kilroy was here
rivets
overly invasive personal questions
Gary Lineker’s crisps
and
barbicide.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – cats square off against their greatest adversaries: cucumbers.

Thanks jolly much to today’s sponsors Squarespace.com. Get 10% off their website-hosting and -designing services for a whole year with the discount code ‘answer‘.

Martin just won a BRITISH PODCAST AWARD for his Tom Waits podcast Waits Waits Don’t Tell Me But Waits There’s More Song By Song! Well done Martin!

Better listen to Song By Song, then; and to Olly’s The Week Unwrapped and The Modern Mann; and to Helen’s Allusionist and her new gig on Radio 4’s Four Thought from 17 May.

You can also hear our past selves in the retro AMT episode we throw into your feed mid-month; to get it, subscribe to AMT on your podcatcher of choice. Or if you want more of them at the time of your choosing, they’re all available at answermethisstore.com, along with our special albums.

Free audiobook? Free audiobook: answermethispodcast.com/audible.

Send us your QUESTIONS: call the Question Line on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, and email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Be our interfriend at twitter.com/HelenAndOlly and facebook.com/answermethis.

We’ll be back with AMT351 on 1 June 2017, and with a Retro AMT on 18 May.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT350 Child-Friendly Rating: 77%. Couple of swears, no grot. •••

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smell my finger

April 10, 2014

CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT286

In AMT286, Ben from Northumberland complained of the assault upon his nostrils from his grandmother’s strong perfume. Chris from Hook writes:

A friend of mine used to work with a charity and in doing so she used to meet a lot of people who did not smell particularly good. She used to manage not to gag most of the time by dipping her finger into her perfume before meeting them. She’d let it dry, then she’d have a very strongly scented finger. She’d sit there talking to them, and when she needed to, she’d rub her nose or sit with her finger under her nose, and it worked like a charm.

That’s fighting fire with fire – perfume might not drown out perfume but intensify it into a super-perfume, like the MRSA of scents. Perhaps Ben should counter with quite a different sort of smell, like Roquefort or mackerel. It’s a risk, though, and also people might wonder why Ben permanently has his finger beneath his nose, as if he’s covering up a Hitler moustache someone drew on him with permanent marker while he was passed out drunk.

So perhaps Ben should try Kyle from London‘s advice:

I used to work for an organisation which served a sometimes distinctly pungent clientele. We used to dab a bit of Vaseline (or in extreme cases Vicks) under each nostril which apparently catches some of the smell particles. Always worked for me!

Smart! Now all Ben needs to worry about is whether his suspiciously glistening upper lip will make his grandmother whip out a hanky and give his nose a vigorous wipe.

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EPISODE 264 – Roger Federer’s urine

July 25, 2013

SchnorbitzHello listeners,

Today, in Answer Me This! Episode 264, we pretend to remember the most beloved 20th century canine entertainer. No, not Lassie! No, not Rin Tin Tin. No, not Columbo’s Basset hound… Alright, one of the Top 40 (give or take) most beloved 20th century canine entertainers: Schnorbitz.

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We also discuss:

Skee-Lo‘s wishes
open-air Shakespeare
dumping your cat-sitter
perfect picnics
barley water
pina colada-scented dog shampoo
manly smells
Johnny Depp vs. Sean Maguire
AMT classic episodes vs. Casablanca
eating in front of Keane and Suede
The Psychopath
and
macaroni collages.

Plus: Olly is a human salad, with the Body Shop providing the dressing (but don’t put any strawberries in it!); Helen makes things other than podcasts; and Martin the Sound Man resolves to suspend his scepticism. We’re sure that’ll last more than 0 minutes.

In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App, which is available for iDevices and Android, we consider the Bacardi Bat and its similarity to Captain Birdseye. Certainly if we were choosing one of them as the voice of a joke Twitter account, we’d go for the one that can at least communicate in words. Sonar doesn’t translate well to tweets.

If you would like us to translate your QUESTIONS into podcast, send them to us as voicemails deposited on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

AMT264 Child-Friendly Rating: 50%. Bit of swearing, short discussion about sex, plus a section about a dead dog. Children do get upset by dead dogs.

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EPISODE 226 – the sentimental stain

August 2, 2012

Guys. Why are you bothering with the London Olympics, when you need to preserve your energy for the year’s most important contest? That’s right – the British Firework Championships are only days away! And at least one of Team AMT should be looking to start a new career there, as we discover in Answer Me This! Episode 226. Prepare to detonate:

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Also going off in the episode:

Mass Market Muesli
clutch bags for the Third World
immersive theatre
psychic jurors
hipster aprons
teacher sadism by proxy
Routemaster buses
the Penguin
Shwopping vs. consumerism
Captain Hook vs. Gordon Ramsay
us vs. Bob Dylan
and
‘London’s Best Scare Experience 2008-2011’.

Plus: Olly has a damp stinky manbag; Helen errs by bringing actual fruit to the Apple store; and Martin the Sound Man recommends not trying to multitask during sexual activity if you’re a novice.

This week’s Bit of Crap on the App is a question from Kenny, about whether he was wrong to fuck over his work buddy in order to score a promotion. Is it a fair case of survival of the fittest, or survival of the fuckiest? Find out on iDevices and Android.

You can also find out a whole lot if you listen to the AMT Sports Day. Most of that lot will be about sport, but since the Olympics is currently in full swing, you’d only be having to listen to sports commentators rabbiting on anyway whenever you turn on the television. Us or them, US OR THEM???

It only remains for us to ask you to ask us something: send your QUESTIONS as voicemails to the Question Line (Skype answermethis or dial 0208 123 5877) or as emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

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EPISODE 193…not.

October 20, 2011

…actually, not ‘not’. See what a pain in the arse that joke is? Leave it in the 90s, people! This is our plea in Answer Me This! Episode 193:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Today we ponder upon:

Indian cows
Utterly Butterly
beluga whales vs. beluga caviar
holy salt
claiming sanctuary
charity shop returns policies
cloud computing
flyers
milk.com
contact lenses
Teri Hatcher in Swedish
shoe mnemonics
breastfeeding men
transubstantiation
and
the irony of Google Chrome.

Plus: Olly is jealous of you people who’ve had milkmen (oo-er, missus!); Helen will be hiding in plain sight when she goes on the lam; and Martin the Sound Man is happy to be the theme of your stag/hen parties. L-plates and fake veils do look great against a tweed jacket and facial hair.

This week’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iPhones, iPads and Android devices) is about the books that wind up in charity shops before they are even dog-eared. Not this book, though! Perish the thought.

Do NOT, however, perish thoughts of sending us your QUESTIONS. Pose them to us as voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or fire up the Skype and look for answermethis) or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. In the Age of Austerity, it’s one thing you needn’t stint upon.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

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